Frankenstein #2

I know that's not the whole title but I think Shade as an acronym is silly. Getting that right out of the way.

Spoilers as well.

In my last post I heaped praise on Lemire's Animal Man #2 like potatoes at Thanksgiving dinner. Well, now I'm on a diet. Frankenstein is, um, not good.

Essentially: Frankenstein discovers a bunch of kids and that other kids apparently were used as sacrifices. Frank bitch slaps the priest across the cellar and then mutters a one-liner about his wrath not discriminating by age. Ho-hum.

Then the crew inside the church walks out into the street where they were just moments ago last issue, and suddenly the street is clear of monsters. Well, living monsters. The vampire and werewolf dudes are standing over a massacre of vaguely drawn monsters. Apparently, they cleared out what was a huge effin deal last month in no time. Maybe in the time between issues they were still killing all the monsters that had overrun the town. Whatever.

So Father Time has figured out where the monsters are coming from so they head over. He picks the fish lady as his companion to go see the portal under the lake. In some lackluster storytelling, fish lady jumps into the water and narrates some stock narration intro to the effect of "while I should have been thinking about the mission I could only remember blah blah blah."

She gives us her back story that includes a dead child (sad) and then the resulting work she's done for SHADE. The first monster-making project actually made monsters (whoda thunk) and so they have to ditch them into a different dimension (hm, sounds suspiciously familiar). Later she used actual human adults for the existing team test and so that is the genesis of the team (yay now I know).

Of course we find out more about the monster portal and that the town has been superstitiously sacrificing children to it, and that the monsters they already fought were scouts, and the rest of the planet is set to invade.

Someone then makes the stupidest conclusion ever that they need to take the fight to them as a result. Or, you know, you could figure out a way to close the fucking portal to an evil monster filled planet set on invading your own. But no, they pull some dimensional ship out of someone's ass then they head through.

Science scanners tell them the planet's surface is organic but when they get through it's full of monsters. Oh no! And Frankenstein's "wife" is standing atop a pile of these monsters and she quips "about time". And scene.

Now, I realize I summarized here and summary is not criticism, or so M keeps telling her students, but I wanted to go through the plot to point out how ridiculous this story is. I don't require a serious or lofty story, but I do want one that makes sense, and this story is a disaster.

Worse, it really does seem like those monsters that fish lady made in our shoehorned narrative flashback have a good shot at being the monster planet. Which would be super lame. And super convenient. And, worse, very poorly foreshadowed. I hope I'm wrong.

I also joked before about the vaguely drawn monsters, but the art in this book is a little underwhelming. Where Animal Man has a weird art style that compliments the genre it is working in, Frankenstein's art style just seems lazy and fails to illustrate this convoluted world they are constructing. This is a real campy series, and I dig the premise, but give me some details and consistency in the art. When characters are not in focus they are drawn like after thoughts, and the whole village/planet of monsters loses all impact because they look like a mass of monster masses. Nothing can be too scary or threatening because they just look like body shaped squiggles with some teeth and eyes. Save me.

So then my final complaint is one I wrote about in my impressions of Frankenstein #1, and that is Frankenstein's lack of character. This guy is supposed to be the main character of a series that is inherently campy. The werewolf dude makes a joke with Frankenstein and he's all like, hrrm, I don't have time for humour. Of course, by the end he does make a joke, and he says that he is learning to adapt. He better learn to adapt pretty damn quick and make that a defining characteristic, because a campy comic with a main character without a strong sense of irony is a comic that falls as flat as the last two issues. If you're going to rip off Hell Boy, at least rip off the reason people like Hell Boy.

I still like the mummy. If nothing else, they should make the comic about him. Cuuuurse...

Animal Man #2

Spoilers!

Before I began to read the new 52 I really didn't get the idea of a horror comic. My mind went to Tales from the Crypt, and then, obviously, to the Tales of the Crypt cartoon from my childhood. Not exactly the stuff of nightmares. I couldn't understand how a comic could be scary.

Then I read Animal Man and now I get it.

Animal Man isn't a scary per se, rather it's just kind of fucked up.

The last page reveal from #1 was a pretty haunting image. It made me begin to reconsider my conception of horror comics. Animal Man #2, however, completes the argument. I see how a comic work within the horror genre. It might not be nails into the chair suspenseful, but it is disturbing. And Animal Man is quite disturbing.

Where Animal Man #1 had a single horrifying depiction, #2 has long list or terrors.

• Feeding the skeleton cat milk because it is hungry.
• Maxine morphing the neighbour's arm into a chicken leg.
• The gigantic tumors on the hippos.
• Some monsters that appear to have open sores for skin.
• The possessed human forms with their swollen cheeks.

And this is without addressing the cover, which is pretty messed up in and of itself. A mass of fleshy gore with a single eye that doesn't stare at the fleeing Animal Man and Little Wing, but straight off the page at the reader.

Forget all the monsters and the possible evil that is entering the world, the most disturbing part of this issue is when Maxine turns the neighbour's arm into a chicken leg. While all the other things are also disturbing, their origins are in some form of threat or evil, presumably Sethe, but this incident is born out of a little girl's fear for her family. She sees this man hurting her brother and so she protects him--a perfectly reasonable and human reaction, but the manifestation of this aid is terrifying. And Maxine isn't disturbed by what she has done to him either. She has to be convinced to change his arm back.

Such horror coming from a place of innocence is truly unsettling, especially as it hints at the cruelty that is bound to that innocence.

Final thought for #2: at first I was a little put off by the art in Animal Man. Even when I was looking at preview pages I assumed they were still in draft form. The art style is not at all what I think of when I think comics and it really took me out of the first issue.

I have come to see, however, how this style really lends itself to the horror genre. It at once keeps "reality" surreal and the fantastical elements like the dream world or the deformations less obviously fantastical.

By destabilizing how we see the real world of the comic, we don't recognize the horrific elements as foreign to that world. Which is sort of creepy and impressive.

And that is what I love about Animal Man. Everything really does work together to create a whole. Instead of separate words and pictures, Animal Man seems to be intentionally constructed as a comic. Real darn impressive.

Also, did you notice when Maxine is gearing up for the journey she has glasses on that kind of look like the old Animal Man goggles? Nice touch, Little Wing.

Swamp Thing #2

Here be minor spoilers.

HOTT

Damn right Swamp Thing. I feel pretty positive about this book. The #1 had a distressing lack of Swamp Thing in the actual comic, but #2 starts strong and keeps Swamp Thing around for the bulk of the comic. So my first criteria was met.

You might remember that my first discussion of Swamp Thing #1 said that I thought this was to be a campy book, that Swamp Thing was a campy series. Well, I guess my assumptions were wrong because this seems like a pretty damn serious comic.

The comic uses the bulk of its pages for Swamp exposition. Swamp Thing prime talks to man Swamp Thing, Holland, and explains at length how Holland has to come back and become THE Swamp Thing again so that he might fight some age old evil. It is the expositional equivalent of that scene in The Great Outdoors with John Candy when he eats the giant steak. Like John Candy, I got it down, for the children

Since I don't know much about the Swamp Thing world, these pages of "you are the one true hero, Link!" actually help me get a grasp on what's going on in the comic. The exposition pairs well with the artwork, providing some good imagery to represent the rambling back story we're reading. The giant murderous flesh monster walking down main street is the image that sticks in my brain most.

Admittedly, I may get more out of this comic because I read Animal Man, and I can see and imagine how their stories are connected. I'm not sure how ol' Swampy #2 would stand on his own.

The back story that does come out through Holland and Swamp Thing prime's conversation hints at the brutal history of Holland as Swamp Thing. This is something that I know nothing about. I am confident I have read an origin Swamp Thing comic, written by Morrison, in which the Swamp Thing man is actually reborn as a plant. This seems to me the past that is referenced. I might have to do a little research, gosh darnit. Let me know if my assumptions are right about Morrison's Swamp thing. I'd be willing to pick up a trade.

MORE SPOILERS

Now that we're all here in spoiler land I can discuss how much I enjoyed the ending where the locals zombie him in his hotel room. Those twisted heads are disturbing, especially in mob form. Both Animal Man and Swamp Thing are doing a good job at making Sethe threatening in both a global and localized way.

The white haired woman thing was super lame though. Are writers not aware of how obvious these hooks are sometimes?

"Beware the woman with white hair!"
"Two-four good Swamp Buddy." Oh hell, I'm being attacked by a woman with a twisted around head and an axe, but yay a helmeted woman helps me escape but--"Oh god she has white hair"
*cue dramatic music*

Sigh.

Looking forward to #3.

October 19th Shopping Spree

Wowwee. Grabbed my comics on Wednesday. I grabbed what was on my reserve and then, I grabbed a few more. I keep telling myself that this is 3 weeks of comics so I shouldn't freak out, but I am a little freaked out because this is a big stack of comics and I didn't really think I was the kind of person who would just go in and buy big stacks of comics because they add up and you have to pay for them every month and that isn't in my budget and worse what happens after like 4 months of this and even if I am buying less, where am I going to keep all these comics and am I going to need to get boxes to store them, because after all some of them are #1s and they sold out like Batgirl and Action Comics, not like I expect these things to be worth a lot of money, but you do have to think about these things after all, there is a market for these number ones, especially because who knows how comics are going to be read in a few more years with digital distribution and their sales the way they are and fuck fuck fuck:

Blur added to protect the innocent.

That's right it says forty eight dollars.

It's for three weeks though.

And I didn't buy any Magic cards or action figures so I'm going to chalk this up as still not unhealthy. I want to engage in the critical discussion surrounding this relaunch, and so I have to buy the comics so that I can read them and think about them. I also enjoy reading them. Some of them.

This rationalization will suffice.

October 5th, 12th, and 19th Pull List: This Shit is Going to Cost Me

I have been irresponsible in purchasing these comics by week. Now I have to go and buy three weeks of comics. I hope not to have much trouble getting all the comics I want since they should be reserved for me, though I can't remember exactly what my reserve list says, but it shouldn't be too far off the below.

Let's do this week by week:

October 5

• Action Comics - I am really excited about this one. I like the reduced powers Superman. And to see him in the hands of government is a promising story.
• Animal Man - From what I've seen, this comic is going to get messed up. Love it.
• Swamp Thing - I'm hoping Swamp thing is actually in this one.

October 12
Oh crap, this month had a stack. Might need to get one of those payday cash loans for tonight.

• Batgirl - I like Batgirl as a character. Looking forward to more self deprecating inner monologue. I have a feeling this comic might be a little more serious though, dealing with the complications of her PTS.
• Batwoman - I can't wait to look at this comic. Might also read it too.
• Frankenstein - This is one of those, I hope this book changes my mind scenarios.
• Green Lantern - Haha. Oh Green Lantern. People like you, I'll see if I can get it.
• Resurrection Man - I'm curious to see where this one goes. I'm wonder how the demon school girls plan to cosplay this month. Maybe french maids?
• Suicide Squad - I'm intrigued by the, kill the entire stadium thing. Please explain #2. Also, let's see some more of that shark guy.

October 19
Good golly. Do you really think this is a good idea? I had plans this weekend.

• Batman - This is the Batman I chose, and I'll give him a chance. Every other comic I've read him, he's a narrative device. I'm hoping Batman might actually be a character here. Might need a DC encyclopedia to understand the history of all his sidekicks though.
• Birds of Prey - I'll give this one another shot. Not a lot of enthusiasm for it though. Might feel better if more of the team is involved.
• Catwoman - Big shit storm of the month award aside, I really dug Catwoman, which I discussed at length. She's funny, in charge, developed, and the comic is obsessed with her body, like almost every other DCnew52 comic was about their female characters. *cough cough Voodoo cough*
• Wonder Woman - I'm hoping there is less equestrian sacrificial transformations this month. Run sheepies, run!

What is 13 times $3?

Fuck it. It's for my art!

DCnew52 Month 1 Roundup, Part 2

Round 2! I think I managed to get all the comics I haven't already discussed here. If not, I'm sure you'll survive. There will be some minor spoilers.

Swamp Thing

This was the first comic I actually read of the new 52. When human Swamp Thing has his nice long chat with Superman, the book gets a little dry and the momentum of the story sort of wanes. I was a little surprised at the pace, as Swamp Thing has always seemed like a bit of a campy book. Of course, maybe I'm not giving the plant monster enough respect as a literary figure.

The end of the comic makes up for the middle though, when shit gets real for those dudes. That moment when the first guy breaks his own neck under the influence of the evil fly swarm really sold me on the idea that horror comics can actually have some juice. I wasn't scared, (seriously, I wasn't, like not even a little) but it was certainly graphic and shocking.

Wow Superman is Super Boring Award
Is there or isn't there a Swamp Thing in this Comic? Award

Suicide Squad

Suicide Squad wins the award for being the most predictable comic of what I read of the new 52. They are being tortured to reveal information by the very people that formed the team to test their loyalty and bad-assnes? Wow, crazy twist.


Predictability aside, the comic is okay. Nothing too special. Harley Quinn is super sexualized which bugs the shit out of me, and it seems as if Joker kicked her out rather than Quinn leaving him. That's a bad choice if you ask me. Quinn would be a stronger character if she left Joker because she is fed up with his abusive ass, instead we have her pining for the man that uses her.

The shark guy is fucking great though.

The Shark Guy is Fucking Great Though Award

All Star Western

Who would have thought a Jonah Hex comic would be so damn wordy. I swear this one took all night to read. I kind of like the idea of pairing Hex with a bookish type. I wouldn't want to keep this character around by any means, but a partner that is actually studied and prudent would compliment Hex's brute disposition.

The continual psychoanalysis is a nice slightly meta element that allows me to enjoy the book a little more than I probably would. Freud and Jonah Hex. Seems about right.

Best Sitcom Idea Award

Birds of Prey

Honestly, I don't remember much about this particular comic. I remember some transparent ninjas, nonlinear narrative, and the fact that neither the samurai lady or Poison Ivy were in the first issue. As this is another team comic (sigh) I don't expect the team to be fully formed when I pick it up, but I do get confused when characters on the cover aren't in the book. I've heard jokes about Wolverine being on every cover despite never appearing in the comic, but I didn't know Ivy had such power.

Wait, isn't Poison Ivy a fairly consistent villain? I'm not sure how she would fit into this fem-Bat-team. I guess I'll just have to buy more issues to figure out how she fits in. Dammit.

I Wanted to Make a Charlie's Angels Joke but I Thought it Might be Sexist Award

Legion Lost

This comic makes no goddamn sense. Legion Lost is at once both incomprehensibly opaque and narratively clumsy. When characters provide exposition, it's like they're trying to shove a round ham through a square hole. None of it gets through, it just ends up as a huge stinky mess.

Then half the team dies. Like the bug guy. I was curious about the bug guy above everything else. Seriously, he reminded me of Baxter from Ninja Turtles. Lay off.

Belaboured Ham Metaphor Award

Resurrection Man

So this guy doesn't die, just resurrects with powers that are derived from the way he died. How this actually plays out is unclear. In the book he dies in a plane crash and gains the ability to melt. How does that follow precisely?

I'm not sure what Resurrection Man typically does as a hero, but it looks like heaven and hell don't like whatever it is because they have decided the adventure is over and he has die once and for all. Given the character it makes a lot of sense. What doesn't make sense is that each eternal destination's representatives are fetishized women. Hmm.

I like the joke about the angel being "Ga Ga sexy", but at the end when the demons are like slutty evil school girls, I thought there might be a classier way to go about the whole drawing female antagonists. I guess if they aren't Catwoman, people are fine with these particular women being meant for titillation.

Moving on.

Really? School girls? Award


Voodoo

Wow, where to fucking start. So, this takes place in a strip club. And we watch Voodoo strip for page after page. There are some cops watching her. The man cop then has a private dance, and then Voodoo kills him. When she's naked. And a lizard.

Things that really pissed me off:

• This panel:

Male gaze anyone? Christ.

• Another panel I couldn't find a picture of, where we get a nice shot full of the waitress' cleavage. Yeah, that's all that's in the panel. Not her head or face or anything else. It's hard to think this comic thinks women are anything but how it depicts the waitress in this panel.
• Voodoo transforms into a lizard monster but still retains the ridiculous female figure. WITH BREASTS! WHY DOES THE LIZARD WOMAN HAVE BOOBS!?

I'm too tired to tear this comic apart.

Fuck you Voodoo This isn't an award.

I, Vampire

This entire comic is two vampires talking. One seems to be evil and plans to take over the world, the other seems to be one of those vampires with a soul or something. During the conversation, the book flips back and forth between a scene of the two dracula-fromping through the night, and a scene of Angel, I mean guy vampire, combing through dead bodies in what appears to be a post apocalyptic city.

The conversation is fairly tired, since I've seen this story told before. This is the problem for I, Vampire (besides a damn ridiculous title if you ask me): we've all taken in a fair dose of vampires in the last decade(ish). There's Buffy and Angel, Twilight, True Blood, then a slew of other vampire stories. We're inundated with Vampire, thanks.

This isn't necessarily I, Vampire's fault though (the name, however, most certainly is), but they don't manage to press too hard on the mold.

That said, the book doesn't reek of cliche, only a familiar scent. The vampire apocalypse seems interesting, especially as it acknowledges the existence of super heroes. I'm slightly intrigued, especially as it seems the story starts when the vampires have already won.

I have one sticking question though, could vampires really take the Justice League? I mean, Supa Man, Green Lanterns, and Wonder Woman seem like they'd be fairly capable of taking some vampires. For one, I'm pretty damn sure that their fangs couldn't pierce Superman's skin, and secondly, I'm a hundred percent certain that all Batman would have to do is type "plan #alucard" into the Bat computer and it would spit out a series of plans on how to deal with a vampire apocalypse, with global and local strategies, for heroes with super powers and normies like himself.

I guess I'll have to see how I, Vampire plans to deal with this. Dammit again.

Too Soon? Award

The Flash

I kind of like The Flash. I have no real reason why, other than how I know he can run through things and then blow them up. This comic gave me no new reasons to like The Flash though.

What amused me most about this #1 were the campy layouts. The title page reveal is so classic comics I laughed when I hit it. I can't really tell if the creators are trying to make the comic campy or if it was just an ill-conceived page.

Other than a few odd layouts, I really liked the art of the comic. It looks crisp and cartoony. Really fits with how I always thought a super hero comic would be drawn.

Aside from the art, the story telling is a little hamfisted. We see a character die and then we go back and show how the character is a long time friend of The Flash. Seems sort of coincidental that the only guy that dies in the team attack on the science fair is his friend. Of course by the end of the comic we have an inkling for why it isn't a coincidence, but the contrivance remains.

He does go Through Something and Blow it up After, so Yay Award

Justice League Dark

Home stretch. So one thing I'd like to get off my chest is my dislike for changing the narrator mid comic. I understand this is something that comics do and maybe I should just get over it, but when it happens for only a page, and when that character didn't interact with the narrative at all, it seems like that page could have been, you know, trimmed out.

Constantine shows up in JLU, narrates for no reason and then we move on. I'm pretty sure he was included because if he wasn't sales of #2 would be lower as a consequence.

So remember back when I wondered how a vampire could take down Superman and the like? Well, in JLD we see how a witch would take down the JL: teeth. Swarms of old dirty teeth.

Yes, you are right. That is ew.

JLD also falls under the category of not much happened this comic as we are too busy trying to explain a lot of stuff up front, guess I'll have to buy #2 just to get a sense of how the characters will relate to each other and the narrative.

I will buy it too, because Constantine showed up for a page.

Weirdest Way that Superman has ever been Brought to his Knees Award


Tomorrow I plan to grab a lot of comics. Then I can start this whole process over again. Rather than do two GIANT posts, I'll make sure to get smaller ones out more frequently. Yay, action plans.

DCnew52 Month 1 Roundup, Part 1

Been busy at work and at home, and that stack of comics wasn't going to read itself. So, while I'm two weeks behind, I just want to get all of this ugly #1 business out of the way. With awards. Some spoilers.

Aquaman


What was this character like before this book? Did he have his own book or did he just sort of stand around in the JL? Did people make fun of him back then or is this a new development for Aquaman's world?

However Aquaman used to be written, I gotta say, this is a great way to do him. The comic is really self deprecating and has a lot of fun with the character's ethos. Aquaman himself has a touch of emo to him, but I guess we need somewhere to start with the story. "My daddy boo hoo hoo." Shut up and fight some scary fish men.

Favourite part: when the police officer asks if he wants a glass of water and Aquaman just stares at him for a panel.

Best Sense of Humour about Aquaman Award

Firestorm

I felt good about this comic in the beginning. The fake terrorists were fairly brutal and a nice change from super villains. I didn't even mind the racial conflict established between the comic's two protagonists. The dialogue was okay and the bad guys were plausible and threatening.

Then the super powers came out and the characters erupted into melodramatic monologues before they even knew they were fucking super heroes. The end is a real big let down.

Best Sudden Turn to Shit Award

Wonder Woman

This comic has received a lot of praise. And justifiably. It sets up a pretty odd scenario with the villains/mystery, and it pulls Wonder Woman into the story with what seems to be the stretchiest stretches ever used in narrative. "Hey look, take this thing-a-ma-jim. Yay, now Wonder Woman is here."

The introduction of the centaurs is also one of the most disturbing things I've seen out of the New 52. At first I thought the figure in the feathers was WW, until she sliced off the head of that horse and then a mutherfucking torso started climbing out. Jesus mighty.

Most Intriguing Use of Greek Mythology Award
Poor Horsies Award

Animal Man

I was pretty excited for this comic. Maybe a little too excited. In my excitement I actually read a great deal of material that was released promoting this book and the new 52. Unfortunately this left me with not much new material to read when I sat down with the book. I had seen a lot of the pages before, so I really just read how they connected together.

That said, I enjoyed the family dynamic that Lamire sets up, especially with the daughter. Then when the dream sequence came, it really amped up the story. The last panel in particular shocked the socks off me. It's a fantastic reveal, grounded in a relatively conspicuous element from before. M said it would give her nightmares. Rightly so.

Hands Down Most Amazing and Disturbing Last Panel, like Ever, Award

Frankenstein

Not much to say about this one. The universe seems fine enough, but there isn't much immediately that pops out as all that fun. Frankenstein and team seem like DC's attempt at Hellboy. Problem is Frankie and the rest of the cast just don't seem as engaging as Hellboy and crew. Better shape up!

Biggest Dissapointment Award
Most Blatant Hellboy Ripoff Award

Batwoman

This book just looks incredible. It is worth a read if only to look at the page layouts. I'm pretty happy to see a lesbian as a main Bat-character as well.

Can't say I am immediately won over by the supernatural stuff that Batwoman seems to be up against. Fighting ghosts and skeleton-headed secret government agency middle management are not typically what I expect of a Batman comic, but I am willing to give it a chance.

My worries are a) that it might actually be ghosts or some shit which doesn't fit in with the Batman universe as I've come to know it. Batman and friends have enough trouble fighting the villains in Gotham, they don't need to fight ghosts on top of that. That's what Ghostbusters are for.

Or b) that it isn't a ghost and we're going to get pulled into an inappropriately adult shifted Scooby Doo caper. "I would have done it too, murdered all those people, if it weren't fer that pesky Batwoman."

Best Page Layouts Award
Holy Shit Batwoman is Fighting a Fucking Ghost Award

Batgirl

This is another comic that is just really charming. Batgirl is a lot of fun to read as a character. Her inner monologue as she handles the perps is quite funny and endearing.

Of course, there is an elephant in the room, a big elephant that got out of it's even bigger wheelchair. I understand why people are upset that Barbra Gordon has been undone as an example of a strong disabled female character. I don't have a but there, it's a real shame.

Barbara is dealing with posttraumatic stress though, so there is that. One disability was switched for another. This might not seem like a fair trade for those people that used to look to her as an strong example of a character with a disability, but maybe people with anxiety disorders feel differently.

Most Unfortunate Controversy

Batman

Batman is a fairly unremarkable comic. I mean I like Batman, and the beginning where he's fighting all the famous villains is pretty enjoyable, and their designs are pretty decent.

But the whole mystery that we are introduced to isn't all that intriguing. I have to say it should seem obvious to everyone that the revealed suspect obviously isn't the killer. Maybe in some weird comic-booky way, but not in any honest character driven way. Maybe I'm wrong, but it is most likely that I'm not. So the mystery seems a little hollow.


Highest Robins per Panel Ratio Award

Red Hood

Since I'm doing the run down on Batman titles, why not discuss Red Hood now and get this all done with.

So yes, Starfire is horribly objectified and portrayed as a body that desires casual sex with whomever. This is likely not the way that DC should responsibly portray their characters. If that's what her character is like, than there is nothing wrong with her choosing to have casual sex with every man in the DC universe. The sticking point is whether this is pandering to the base male audience that comic readers are often thought of as. So there. Starfire's depiction pretty much ruins what starts out as a pretty decent comic.

Yeah! I really liked the first few pages of Red Hood. The art is crisp, and the first few pages frame the setting and action really well. When Red Hood bursts from the fat priest suit I was conflicted. While this was pretty damn cool, I knew Starfire was about to show up.

And she does show up, and then I started feeling uncomfortable with the writing. While the shots of Starfire Baywatching are pretty reprehensible, one of the things that offends me the most is when Roy asks Red Hood about his relationship with Starfire he makes a comment about how he has had her. I didn't realize escaping in a jeep from a military group was also the time for locker room talk about penis conquests. Silly me.

To be fair, I've never been in a jeep fleeing a military force or a locker room. What would I know.

Biggest Boob Award
Best Opening Award

Is DCnU a Real Reboot?

Today we discuss the "n" of DCnU fame.

I've read a month worth of the DC"n"U comics. Not all of them, but enough. I probably hovered around half. <UPDATE: I counted, it is precisely 26> Some of the comics seem like reboots (Action Comics, Frankenstein), a lot seem like relaunches (Swamp Thing, Animal Man), and the rest just seem like new arcs for existing stories (Green Lantern, Batman).

So where does that leave us with this reboot? It's bullshit, but a brand of bullshit that makes a lot of sense.

Batman #1 provided my tipping point last week:

Can a ginge get some diversity?

Really? Thanks for the labels to indicate which Robin is which, but how the hell am I supposed to know what these characters mean? Wouldn't a reboot mean I'd meet each Robin in turn? This single panel hints at quite a lot of back story. Certainly more than five years, the time period DC claims this new U has existed.

I know a little bit about these Robins, but this panel screams bloated canon, the very thing I thought this reboot was supposed to deliver me from.

So while I do think that DC has in some sense lied or BSed us about where these new 52 books fall as reboots, maybe I'm not really angry about it.

As I read through these books, I did become frustrated at times when they presented characters with  backgrounds obviously not rebooted. After all, I started reading comics this month because I thought I could get into these stories with the slight-more-than-cursory knowledge I possessed. This was to be a starting point for me.

Green Lantern and Legion Lost are great examples of characters that seem to have just had a #1 slapped on their new adventure. These stories mean nothing on their own without each story's continuity.

Green Lantern succeeds as an introduction because it provides enough reference to fill in back story for a new reader. I don't know a lot about Green Lantern, but I know the basics. This story is a new arc, not a reboot, but it was written as a point of introduction.

Legion Lost, however, fails at introducing me to the Legion Lost's universe. Admittedly, I bring zero knowledge of these characters to my first read, so perhaps the book isn't as opaque as it seems to me, but the book also doesn't even try to help me catch up with the world. From Legion Lost #1:

Red Robot Guy: Tyroc, I told you the longer we waited following Alastor's wake, the harder it would be to pierce the Flashpoint Breakwall!

Dude with Goggles and White Vest, probably Tyroc: People needed our help in the 31st Century First, Wildfire. We came after him as soon as we could.

That is some excellent exposition. Just exquisite. I appreciate it trying but Legion Lost fails as a new arc / relaunch because without prerequisite knowledge this makes no goddamn sense at all.

The conclusion that I have come to about all of this DC reboot hand-waving, is that it is not so much a relaunch as a collective effort to make the continuities across the board more accessible.There are quibbles about what is still continuity, and what isn't. There are people that just want DC to lay out what has happened in the universe and what hasn't, what they are keeping as canon.

But, this is the wrong approach. DCnU is DC's attempt to let people in. We aren't starting each character over from scratch, but asking us as readers to let them recreate canon.

So, the reason DC can't give a straight answer about what has happened and what hasn't happened in this new DCU is that they plainly don't know. Canon is gone. Some characters are in similar places as they were before, some characters are now different, and there are some new additions to the DCU, but what has happened before the #1s is something that DC will create. Canon will be what the writers of the new 52 comics and the other comics to follow construct. And ultimately, what the eventual audience of this DCnU decide is canon.

Asking DC what is canon is like asking DC from 10 years ago what canon would be now. DC may have some preliminary plans and courses for this new launch, but from their comments online, their plans seem more than a little bit hazy. Whether DC has everything planned out already, or whether they have no idea, as an audience, I'm curious why some believe DC owes us an explanation of this nU's canon at all. How I see it now, DC's story and characters haven't been rebooted per say, rather the history of these characters.

Batman does have a bajillion different Robins still, just like he had before the reboot, but now maybe he has them for different reasons. Their back stories might be similar, but we can't necessarily assume that. They all might be his clones for all we know. God sakes, they look the same after all.

After a month I now think that the DCU isn't new, it just having it's history reworked. This reworking might be for narrative reasons, but more likely, is is a way to expand DC's readership. DC may seem to be running around like a crazed chicken, but maybe that's because they are trying to figure this thing out just like everyone else.

As a creative process, I respect that DC might not have a master plan, that they are trying to refocus the collaborative Universe of stories and character to make their product more accessible. As a purely financial decision, I respect that decision. At the present moment it might seem like DC has taken a step out onto the tightrope without ever thinking about training, but I am willing to let them try and figure it out. That's storytelling.

If they actually do fall and go splats, I stand to save a nice wad of money on comics every month. Win, win.